Did you do that when you were 11???

Yesterday my 11 year old approached me for a friend to come over. The day before it had been "Can I go to her place?", which I had complied with. Usually I prefer to check it all out, but this time my head was in another place so I just said yes. It was as I was dropping her off that I started to have reservations. But by that time it was too late to change my mind.

Well, I went to pick her up and she was not there. She'd gone to another friend's place for a swim. I arrived at the stated pick up time...no child. So I waited while they phoned and then the father of the house went and picked up the girls. Suffice to say, I was a little concerned about the arrangement.

So the next day when my child says can she come over, with the child standing right there looking at me with the big puppy dog eyes, I go yes, under duress, thinking that if she was allowed, I probably owed the family for having my child the day before.

It wasn't until after I took the child home 8pm at night, after being pressured into having her stay for tea by my daughters that I discovered that my mobile phone was missing. I asked the girls about it and they sheepishly produced it for me. I thought nothing of it, other than being mildly knicked off that they'd taken it without my permission. It was even later when I noticed photos of the girl starting to slideshow across the screen of my mobile. I became mildly annoyed that they had filled the phone up with these photos but still not enough to rant and rave. However, on closer examination I was totally shocked to find a video clip, of the visiting 11 year old, prancing around topless and slapping her butt at the camera, porn style.

You can imagine my chin dropping to the floor. As I examined the video soundtrack more closely I could hear the girl giving them instructions about how and what to film and it got me wondering how many times this child has done this before???

Not really knowing how to deal with this, I explained to my children that firstly they should never have taken my phone and used it for this type of purpose because if anyone else were to see it I would be arrested for indecent dealings with a child! Secondly, I explained that what they had filmed had a name and it was illegal and called child pornography, they were a little shocked. I'd like to think that they are still innocent, but having seen some of the very sexual music clips on TV and the advertising of adult television in children's hours I think it would almost be impossible to remain innocent in this day and age.

But what to do about it? Do I tell the parents? Do I speak directly to the child? Do I involve the school? Was it just an innocent child imitating what they've seen somewhere or was there more to the event?

I think back to when I was 11 and I try to remember if I would have done this at that age? Would you have done this when you were 11?

Suffice to say, I will be maintaining a more vigilant eye on future guests to our home as I never want a repeat performance!